I chose to write about one of the examples Carter provides. Do you agree with Carter's reasoning?
The article states "A wonderful epigram sometimes attributed to the filmmaker Sam Goldwyn goes like this: "The most important thing in acting is honesty; once you learn to fake that, you're in." The point is that honesty can be something one seems to have. Without integrity, what passes for honesty often is nothing of the kind; it is fake honesty or it is honest but irrelevant and perhaps even immoral.
Consider an example. A man who has been married for fifty years confesses to his wife on his deathbed that he was unfaithful thirty-five years earlier. The dishonesty was killing his spirit, he says. Now he has cleared his conscience and is able to die in peace."
I believe that he held a lie for a very long time and that he came clean for his own being not for his wife's. I believe it was a selfish act and if that was my husband I don't know if I would have chose to forgive him or not. It's one of those situations you have to live in order to know how you would respond.
I do agree with Carter that it is a fake honesty and immoral act. It's definitely an immoral act of the example that Carter chose to provide but the example I agree with. This was a good example that Carter came up with. I agree with the reasoning in the sense that "without integrity, what passes for honesty often is nothing of the kind, it is fake honesty or it is honesty but irrelevant and perhaps even immoral." The example was a perfect example of an immoral act.
Hi Dina,
ReplyDeleteI like the point Carter makes that the husband is "twice unfaithful." I think most people agree that the husband's affair is immoral and through it, he is unfaithful to his wife. Not many people would perceive the act of finally telling her the truth as another instance of being unfaithful, but it's an insightful argument. Carter is arguing that there are multiple expectations between married couples, and that there are multiple ways in which they are expected to be faithful. In this case, because the husband puts himself above the needs of his wife, he is not faithful to his marriage vows.
I wonder what you all think about this example if we apply Ericsson's argument about lies. The husband probably engaged in multiple lies the first time he was unfaithful, and then he created a facade that forced his wife to live a lie. Does anyone want to argue that it's better for the wife to know the truth about her husband and her marriage?
Thanks for your insights.
Take care,
Lauren
hi, I agree with you, carter does give an exacted example. Integrity is sometimes used in fake ways and people cant run from it. I enjoyed reading insights. He did die in peace and it showed that he did it for himself, not only his wife's.
ReplyDeleteThank You, Lesley
Hi Dina:
ReplyDeleteCyber Honesty!! Kinda resembled fake honesty to me...I always look at this immoral acts of dishonesty in cheating as misconduct...such as something being against the law...you are stealing time and good faith from someone who believes you are honest....I couldn't agree more that it was such a selfish act he chose to untold on his death bed being unfaithful!! I wonder at times people who can do that and think nothing of it...what else did they do that we would have choked about and they thought nothing of It???
Thank you for the reading Daye
I also chose to write about this example that Carter used. I think that it best describes what he is trying to explain. I agree with Lauren in that I liked how Carter says that the husband is "twice unfaithful". I believe that the husband is unfaithful to his wife twice. Once, for the actual affair. And twice, for not thinking about his wife's feelings when he reveals to her that he had had the affair in order to clear his conscience before he passed away. I think that this husband was very selfish. If my husband ever did this to me, I do not believe that I would forgive him. Even if I forgave him, I would never forget it.
ReplyDeleteWell after reading your response, you gave me a new idea to think about. That integrity can be used in fake ways. I agree with your example as well. If it were my husband, I would of forgiven him only because hes dead now so why carry that kinda weight on your shoulders for a dead man, but it was a very selfish thing to do, and I cant honestly say how i'd react to something like that. I forgive very easily, people are human and we all make mistakes but the forgetting part would take some time I'm sure being married for so many years to someone you thought was loving and faithful.
ReplyDeleteI agree that it was a selfish act. He did it for his own sake not for his wife. He ended up hurting her more than if he confessed when it first happened. HIs wife is now going to have to live with what he told her for the rest of her life. Good reading thanks!
ReplyDelete